Blessingsndreams

Grace "The Beginning" Part One

"My Grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." 2 Corinthians 12:9 (NIV)

Oh, Lord, My one and Only. How I long to see your face. How amazing it is to live in your Grace. How divine it is your constant Presence!

I sometimes or most of the times forget how difficult it is to be a Christian. Other times, I forget that I am living under the Grace of God. Can't seem to make up my mind,lol

Grace from the Greek word charis conveys someone superior (God) that cares and loves unconditionally someone inferior (man).

I am man. I am a sinner. I am inferior compared to the owner and creator of everything mankind has ever known. But I have been reconciled to God the Father, throughout Christ who died in the cross for my sins.

I have been around the block more than once, or even more than that. But the life that I am living now is completely unbelievable. Only a Christian can understand it and rejoice for knowing that it is the works of God, His grace that is at hand of this inferior servant.

In July 2008, I had a very difficult situation. In a couple of months it got worse. I broke to my lowest. Finally I had my heart shattered. Walked in a church that was not one of what I knew and I was pulled in from the heart. I never did not had in the church I visited since growing up (I was always church-hopping) such an intense pull. Scriptures say: "The one who enters by the gate is the shepperd of the sheep. The gatekeeper opens the gate for him, and the sheep listen to his voice. He calls his own sheep by name and leads them out." John 10: 2-3 (NIV) 

Still giving myself that day, which I will never forget, the new so called life in Christ was so ever difficult. I wanted more. The more I read, the more unsatisfied I felt. I struggled and often said, Lord, I am supposed to be satisfied with your Word. I am supposed to feel full, yet I feel so hungry that I want so much more. How naive! I am a new Christian. Of course, I wanted more. Of course I was still thristy for more. I wanted to know so I could reach what is called a Spiritual Maturity. To know God, His promises, what it meant to be born again as a child of God. I still made mistakes and awefull mistakes. I was angry after loosing so much. Yet I was still saying that it will be God's will. After all, I was secured that nothing more worse was to happen.

Character building. What in the world is that? Well, it is how we get shaped through circumstances. Lost everything a year later. All material things, and most of all, I lost what I though God will protect and allow me to keep. My children.

Never would I have I ever imagine that evil could be so evil. Never understood at that moment why would a loving God would allow this to happen to me. But one thing for sure is that even if I did not understand it then nor I understand much of it now, God has a plan. What ever plan God has, there is no man who will change it. The same way, anything that man does it will not prosper nor stay if God will not allows it or if it is not part of His plan.

Devastation came rushing. I cried, I tried to defend myself. I got angry. I wanted the truth. I was in shock that not even a judge would allow me to present the truth on papers that I had. Proof of the perjury. I wanted answers as to why people who were supposed to be on my side, had turned against me. Older children, their family and friends, school friends, those I called friends, those I trusted everything to, Those I loved so much, became my very enemies. Still to this day, they are all gone. No questions were answered. I was completely left at the mercy of the One who died in the Cross.